So I wanted to just have a general chatty post, because, well, I felt like it.
So I finally bought the entire 'Beneath The Skin' album by Of Monsters & Men on iTunes, and honestly, it's the best £9.99 I've ever spent. I was up until 1.30am this morning listening to it in the dark, lights off and thoughts allowed to flow invigoratingly free.
It was quite healing. I'm the type of person that bottles a lot of stuff up, I don't often like to talk to anyone about my problems, like for example, something that rather damaged me as a child I feel, only really came out and was spoken about by myself one evening recently when everything all became a bit too much. I don't like sharing my problems with others, I really, really don't. I'm a very closed person, and I'm not sure people know that, because I can appear all jolly and open on my blog and social media, but honestly, you'd be getting an inaccurate picture. I keep myself to myself, I appreciate my own company and I don't like bringing up painful memories. Call it damaging, I don't care, I call it protecting.
I'm not a crier either. I think I've mentioned before my immense distaste at crying in public. Not of others, because it saddens me when I see another man or woman crying in public, and my heart goes out to them, and I want to help them, but me crying in public? Never. I'd rather die.
Something that I feel is really touching me recently has been Downton Abbey.
I recently found it the first series free on Amazon Instant Video and I haven't been able to draw myself away from it! So, I went on Depop and found the 1st and 2nd series boxset and purchased it so I can have a hard copy of it! (This is the seller's image)
I'm so excited to get this, it makes me SO MUCH HAPPIER because being frank here, life's been a bit shit at recently, my health has been suffering as a result and I've been a bit depressed (overshare but do I care? Nope not a bit)
Having become an avid Downton Abbey fan, I now have even greater love for my Downton Tabby book that my adopted grandma Wendy bought for me for my 20th! I'm going to be 21 in three months time, bloody scary thought! I already know what my 21st birthday present to myself is going to be :)
It's a pretty lugubrious title, and I can't remember if I've used it before, but it's one of the main lines from "All We Do" by Oh Wonder. In case you didn't know, Of Monsters & Men is my favourite band, and Oh Wonder is my second favourite.
I've been a little less active on my blog the last few days because I've been making so many YouTube videos (you wouldn't know it from my channel!) but I've just made a new YouTube schedule, meaning I upload for 4.00pm on Wednesdays and 5.00pm on Sundays (I'll be talking about this in an upcoming video for more information/clarification and my reasoning) but yes, that's super exciting, so I've been making a lot of videos and consistently editing them, and today I started filming for a video I've always wanted to make but have never had the courage to film, because, frankly, I'm not very good at filming this type of video! So to improve, I've been taking the time to read online articles about how best to use my DSLR camera and this speicific model. I'm improving, but I still feel like this type of video can easily be quite overexposed! I'm making a conscious effort to adjust this accordingly, and trying to make my videos more visually interesting, and as well as that (because I appear to have gone off at an absolute tangent!) I've been building my desk today! Yes, it finally arrived, and I managed to drop the heavy box on my foot (full of desk parts I will just say, it wasn't like an extraordinary super weight cardboard empty box, no, funny thought though!) and my foot is now very swollen, black and blue. However, I did manage to build my desk on my own (which I'm very proud of, and typing at now!) so yes, I'm happy, and my new desk lamp is pretty stylish!
And a close up on some of my desk decor:
This is Pepper the french bulldog. When I'm a bit older and have my own place, I'm going to get a black french bulldog and call him/her (I haven't settled on which gender I'd like) Pepper. I'm always a cat person, 110%, but I do really like French Bulldogs and I would imagine that's down to their size, short hair, and cat like proportions and upright ears! I'll also have a cat though, whether that is Gu, or after her time (oh good god that feels horrible to write that, and I don't often think that far ahead)
And can we just take a moment to appreciate my moon transitional print? How gorgeous is that??!!
And a moment of appreciation for my two new LARGE YANKEE CANDLES please?
I chose Orange Splash as I'm running low on my small Pink Sands jar that Courtney bought me, and when I'm not burning heavy autumnal scents, I like to burn rather more fresh fragrances, and I'd had my eye on this one awhile so I picked it as the replacement, although I will repurchase Pink Sands in a large jar eventually!
And my other new fragrance is Vanilla Bourbon and oh my word I don't know if I love or hate this one- it is SO STRONG! Like really, really pungent! It's a crossover of coffee and burnt toffee - I love toffee, but I hate Coffee! The smell, the taste, everything! I'm a big tea drinker. Be warned if you do choose this scent - a few hours burning and your entire house will smell of it, be that good or bad!
I feel better for popping in and checking up on you all haha, I never like leaving my blog unattended for very long!
Tonight's music pick, is something I find very, very beautiful. It's a bit of a raw, honest song, but it really resonates with me, on so many levels, and about so many experiences, with a couple of people,
So the last time I did a blog post about my daily makeup was probably the beginning of 2014.... weird, I know, plus it was posted on my beauty blog which was permanently archived because I didn't use it enough and would rather everything stayed together here.
So, it's time to share with you what I've been using daily for Autumn!
MAC 'Myth' Lipstick
Laura Mercier 'FireGlow' Eyeshadow
Rimmel Sun Shimmer Bronzing Compact Poweder in 'Light Shummer'
Maybelline Lash Sensational Mascara
L'Oreal Paris Infallible 24 Hour Matte Foundation in '10 Porcelain'
Anastasia Dip Brow Pomade in 'Soft Brown'
Maybelline Baby Skin Instant Fatigue Blur (Primer) in 'Warm Apricot'
Zoeva Rose Golden Brush Set.
As you can see, I've found the perfect combination of makeup for me. As I have combination skin, with an oily T-Zone (especially the center of my chin, above my eyebrows, and above the left and ride sides of my upper lip), it's important I use products that won't set my skin flaring off, as it does this frequently, more so when I'm stressed.
I love the foundation by L'Oreal because it is really high coverage, it hides most of my blemishes almost entirely. If I want extra coverage, then I'll use the Collection Concealer in '01 Fair' (not pictured).
The Instant Fatigue Blur by Maybelline primes the skin and warms everything up before applying the base, it keeps the makeup evenly applied for hours. Since being at university (applying makeup at 5.30am, and removing it at 11.00pm at night sometimes) I've found I need really long lasting makeup that won't let me down, and so far, this overall combination works for me.
I like to switch up my lipstick on a daily basis, but my two main choices are the newest editions to my MAC lipstick collection.
The lipsticks I reach for on a daily basis are Studded Kiss (deep oxblood red) and Myth (peachy, warm nude).
I hope you enjoyed a brief look into my daily makeup.
So I recently posted this image to my Instagram, and asked if anyone would be interested in seeing the recipe for it, and the result was "yes!" so I'm here today to share it with you. (Well, it's 8.02pm on Wednesday 7th October, and I've lit a fire, I'm burning my large cinnamon stick Yankee Candle, and I'm relaxing after having cooked this recipe, and decided what better time to write up the recipe than when it's fresh on my mind? Plus, listening to beautiful tropical house remixes helps pull things together - especially when I haven't listened to it in a long time!)
Okay, so here's what you'll need to serve 1 person:
1/2 a Nectarine
2 Tablespoons Soft White Sugar
1 Tablespoon Water
2 Tablespoons Double Cream
1 Handful Of Pecans
1 Tablespoon Of Vanilla Ice Cream (I used Carte Dore)
Firstly, de- stone the nectarine, and cut in half. Store one half in a sealed Tupperware box.
Next, start making the toffee (yes, it is toffee, because if you like Werther's Originals Sweets, then that's what we're basically making in it's rawest form and liquid, heaven, I know)
Put the sugar and water into a saucepan, and stir until combined, then bring to the boil. It is crucial that you DO NOT LEAVE THE MIXTURE AT ANY TIME. You must stay with the mix if you want to get this just right - leaving for a second will result in it burning. Keep watching the mixture intently.
The colour should gradually change to a light yellow colour: keep watching and be ready with the cream. Once it has turned to a light to mid gold colour, immediately remove from the heat, pour in the cream and whisk with a hand whisk carefully and briskly to ensure the mixture combines thoroughly to avoid lumps forming. Please bare in mind the sugar is red hot - we're talking like a mini solar system here - if this gets on you, you'll more than likely end up in hospital, so please don't be reckless, please be really careful when whisking it!
Meanwhile, leave it to cool slightly and put the nectarine under the grill until warmed through.
Once they are warmed through, roughly chop the pecans into small bits like small lumps of gravel (for a size comparison!)
Place the nectarine into a bowl, add a scoop of vanilla ice cream, and pour over the toffee sauce. Remember, it's super hot still, and immediately soak the saucepan - toffee can be a pain in the rear to clean off saucepans!
Next, generously scatter over the pecans, et voila, you're finished! Make sure the toffee is only warm when you eat it - you don't want red hot toffee in your mouth - just trust me on that one!
So I hope you enjoyed this delicious autumnal desert, if you do decide to make it, just tag me in your photo on Instagram, I'm @thegirlcriedfashion!
And as I said many months ago, once Summer has shed her warming cloak, and Summer turns to Autumn leaves, I too shall shed my ways, and revert to who I was before.
Welcome Autumn. Oh how I've missed you. October 2014 taught me many things. I took many memorable blog photos and OOTDs, looking back at them is somehow comforting, to be able to reminisce about all that was happening in my life back then.
Well, what can I associate this time next year with October 2015? I've moved on with my life. I found something not many are able to find in this day and age, and that is inner peace. I've realized by now at this age what makes me truly happy, and what is just a façade. I can recognize the good in people, and unfortunately, also the bad. I see things with new eyes everyday (even if my sight is quite blurry without the aid of some form of lenses to help magnify it all, and bring it to me in crystal clear resolution).
Autumn brings the gentle colder breeze with the sunshine still beating down, the falling golden leaves, the start to lighting fires, and the scents that make your heart swoon with appreciation. Autumn is the time that you remember fondly throughout the year, and somehow, when you're older, appreciate all the more.
So to encapsulate all my feelings about Autumn, I have created an Autumn GRWM on my channel on YouTube, and it'd mean the world to me if you took a look at it, liked and subscribed. You know the drill by now, just click the photo below to be taken to it. So much time and love has gone into this particular project, I hope you all love it.
"No scorching sun, nor freezing cold, will stop me on my journey."
We live in an age of constant stress; busy jobs, long working hours, complicated home lives, and challenging company. Stress is something that affects us all in very different ways. It can cause aggression, shyness and many more unusual reactions, including a decline in overall health. For me personally, I become before hostile, generally avoiding company, and my health usually takes a turn for the worse, with varying degrees of severity.
However, I have finally come to and found my inner peace. How I did that, is what I wish to share with you.
To do so, it's about letting go, accepting things you cannot change, and finding yourself. It's not as easy as it sounds, but give it time, and patience, and enough valuing of self, and you can do this too.
Starting university for me was both devastating and developing in equal measure. This antithesis shook me through to the soul. It awoke me in a way I didn't think were possible. Leaving college at the end of exams clearly wasn't enough for me to snap to, and actually departing my house on the first rainy morning snapped me back to my senses. This was all very real. This was happening now.
I awoke within myself and found myself standing on a huge campus amass literally thousands of foreign faces. Imagine standing in a crowd in a busy city, all these people having one central connection to you, that they are all there for the same purpose, but you'll never know them all. That's university for you.
However, many of these people are going through the same "drop of the stomach" experience as you, but soon enough, you should settle into the new routine and develop new friendship groups.
On Thursday, I decided that after the first week and a half of university, that on my day off, I would travel back to my old college to visit the friends I had in the English Language class that I've written about here many times before. I was worried, because frankly, it'd been a while since I'd seen them last. I wondered how they'd react, I wanted it to be positive, but I worried that perhaps they wouldn't want to see me. But it wasn't like that at all. It was wonderful. Everyone was so happy to see me, and I received such a warm welcome, I felt right at home again, it was as if I'd never left. How could I have ever have imagined receiving a negative reaction from this group of people? These were the people I'd grown to really care about and respect. It was like I'd never been gone.
Seeing all their faces and remembering the happy times we all spent together, working together, laughing together and getting to know each other in those first few awkward conversation starting weeks, made me content once again. It settled an overturned stone and righted it, leaving it almost untouched, almost unturned once again, to slot comfortably into it's new position, which is much more comfortable to bear.
And truly, it made me so much happier to know that they had missed me, and did still like me, and I certainly felt the same way for every single person in that room. All wonderful, lovely, unique people whom I'd greatly missed.
Funny that, isn't it? How when you start a new college and leave the other behind that you loved so much, thinking "when I'll leave I'll not care even a bit" and it's funny how all that can truly change. Never underestimate a situation, and never try to foresee feelings and events. It won't work. Leave it to fate to decide.
So I wanted to say, that if you've ever left a school with friends in it, or a college, or a job, or whatever it is, and you are contemplating going back to see them, I'd say do it! Take the opportunity whilst you have a day off, and go and see them! It'll make their day, and yours too.
Focusing on the now is what is important too. You can't turn back time, as much as you want to, and you can't turn the clocks forward unfortunately. However, what you do have is the here and the now, so embrace it, for better or for worse, and just live your life. Ride out the bumps, smile through the smooth gliding, and walk the longer stretches. It will always be worth it, even if you can't see it now, you'll likely be able to in the future. Find what inspires you, and live by it.
So what I'm trying to get across in this post, is that it's important to remember who you are, and where you are.
So, as is fairly obvious from my ombre hair, I dye the bottom of my hair with quite severe bleach whenever I feel it requires it. At the moment I'm in the midst of a hair colour transition phase. I'm turning my caramel ends white, and it's taking a lot of time, money and patience, and it is also extremely damaging to my hair.
Keeping my hair in tippity top condition is really hard, it's even worse when you dye your hair (all hair dyers let me hear a "we hear ya!") but I have been harboring a secret for roughly 3 years. It's a product that I came across purely by accident. About 3 years ago, I was perusing the TKMAXX store where I live, as for some reason I was shopping at Christmas time with my mum, buying just about everything imaginable! I can't even remember why we bought so much, all I remember was buying my favourite Ciate nailpolish in the shade Cream Soda, a onesie, and a pencil pot??
Anyway, so that aside, I ended up in the 'beauty bin' which is basically just a shelf of beauty products put on reduction, for some reason or another. I found the Ciate nailpolish, and also I found a hair mask. I was already an avid hair mask fan at this point, but my biggest hair mask investment was Herbal Essences (which as you can tell was inexpensive, and which I would also say it's not a product that I'd recommend, I've used all their hair masks, and honestly, they don't do a thing, it's like using weak conditioner basically and has never made a difference to my hair) However, I came across "The Hair Chemist" branded "Macadamia Oil Deep Repair Masque" and felt intrigued to buy it. It was reduced to £7.00 I think, so I bought it.
I was using that same pot for 2 years, crazy I know, but you only need the tiniest amount once a week to make your hair ultra soft, smooth and shiny!
I have to say that this is honestly by far, the best hair mask I've ever come across. It's super hard to get hold of here in the UK, but whenever I have come across it, it's been really well priced. I've not seen it in a store in the UK since, only online, but I have to say, it is well worth your time.
The texture is ultra creamy, none of this shiny stuff that doesn't do anything: this is the real deal. This is the crème de la crème, and I promise you won't be disappointed with the results.
I wash my hair normally with shampoo and rinse out, then apply this in a conker size amount to the ends of my hair and run it through with my fingers, and leave it to settle into my hair for around 5 minutes in the shower, making sure not to wash it off prematurely. I then wash it all out, making sure to not leave excess in the hair, and you're left with super, soft, luxurious hair. Plus, as an added benefit, it is the best smelling hair product I've ever used, it's smells incredible!
I absolutely adore this hair care product, and would have to say it is truly my haircare hero.
Do you have a hair care hero? Leave a comment below letting me know what you love!